Just a few moments ago, crying in the dark was just what I was doing. It's funny, when I need to write/share the most, that's when I don't feel like blogging. I have been on a rollercoaster of stress and PMDD. Now is the time to slow this rollercoaster down a little.
As I draw near my period, depressing and negative thoughts and behaviors overwhelm me. This worsens during times of stress and drama. A quiet desperation suffocates me and a restlessness to uproot and renew occurs. I cry often, for no or very minor reasons. Anger and irritation are common companions during this time. People wonder what gets into me and I personally wonder if I am truly going insane.
Then, my period occurs, and outside of some possibly severe cramping, everything calms down. Positive thoughts and laughter come back. I remember that I love life. I pick up my issues and goals right where I left them.
I've learned that I can make these symptoms go away if I stay positive and decrease stress and drama. So, it's frustrating to me that this returns. At least I am aware. I've read a lot about stress management, yet seem to stress in successfully doing it. Though, I may not get to that until I detach better from others. Other people's stress is what gets to me. Not to say I don't have enough of my own.
Well, I am glad I wrote this. I feel better and more ready for sleep. Goodnight all! *hugs* <3
I hope you have had a really good night sleep and wake refreshed. it is so good that you are aware what causes tears and stress trials. Please, please be patient with yourself. You didnt get into that state over night, it takes time to establish different coping tools. Crying is so carthargic and when the hormons are playing havoc, well thencrying might be the best release! It hnk hormons can drive one "insane" and play quite some tricks on us! it is one of these moments where our nature simply is nature and not a lot we can do about, except, xry, and accpet that it part of life and being woman!
ReplyDeleteI truly believe you are doing great. In times of need you coem out here and release. You learnt to calm yourself and ger ready for bed. That is a LOT. Thansk fro trusting us / me and coming out here, thanks for showing how you helped yourself. Have a good and calm day. Hugs across the pond!
hi IK~ i'm sorry you have been feeling bad. i think i have very rough pms emotionally. thanks for the link to pmdd. i think i'm very sensitive to my hormonal changes. though some months it feels like i'm still having pms even after my period. some months, i feel like i have only one "happy" week a month. the rest of the time my moods go up and down and insecurity can get out of hand. i like to think it's biological. but since it's gone on in other weeks these past months, i'm trying to do other things to destress as well. anyway, all this is to say, thank you and you have my sincere compassion and here's a big hug if you want one~~~
ReplyDelete"It's funny, when I need to write/share the most, that's when I don't feel like blogging."
ReplyDeleteI am totally with you sister~